Going through this whole car-buying thing over the past two weeks has been quite rewarding, actually. Not only did I end up with a nice car at the end of it all, I’ve learnt quite a lot. Being the kind of person that believes that cars are propelled by goblins, I’ve learnt a lot about automobiles in general. Here’s a shocker: There are no goblins in cars. Yes! I was gobsmacked, gentle reader. Also – much like popcorn at the cinema, engines come in different sizes! The bigger the number, the more powerful it is and the more fuel it drinks – er – consumes. No goblins. No goblins. But there’s a trump card! Diesel! Diesel engines use less diesel than petrol engines use petrol. Problem is, without a lot of fancy mucking about, the performance of a diesel engine isn’t so great. Volkswagen has this fancy-arse turbo diesel thing, um, blah blah blah. I’m bored already. I’m not the kind of person who Twitters about my tyre PSI.

As part of this intense learning (and self-congratulatory) process, I got to talk with a large number of Volkswagen owners. Very few other companies generate the same kind of rabid fanboyism that Volkswagen does. I must confess I’m a victim of this as well – I drove a Golf GTI (Mark IV) in Vancouver, and loved it. Sporty, practical and just fun damnit. She was great to drive. My first car was a 1974 SuperBeetle (with a very weird semi-automatic gearshift) When looking for a car here, we didn’t really actively consider anything but another Golf. We thought about Civics, Mazdas, even a cheap Hyundai – but none of them were Golfs. Once you own one, there’s no going back.

I was talking with Rob the other day (a Golf R32 owner: bastard), and he said “I could sit there all day listening to the sound of the door closing”. I agreed readily. There’s a very satisfying thunk when the door’s closed. Nothing like the tinny noise when other car doors are shut.

Another thing I found interesting. Given the (relatively) small market share of Volkswagen, and the similarly small market share Apple has, there’s a surprisingly large correlation between Apple owners and Volkswagen drivers. A lot of people I know who are Mac users have come out of the woodwork and confessed their Volkswagen leanings – and vice versa. What is it about those two companies that creates such fierce loyalty in their customers?

I’ll leave you now, gentle reader, with one of the funniest things I’ve seen in a while: VW has a series of ads (aimed at the US market, I think), called Un-Pimp Your Ride. Hilarious. There are at least three of them on YouTube. Here’s the first:

“You got an F.”