English rugby fans

The Rugby World Cup is on right now, I’m told. There are games happening all over this fine country, apparently. You might be able to tell I don’t really care all that much.

I was taking the tram back home from seeing a friend up Smith St way, and as we passed by Parliament, about a half-dozen white-and-red clad Poms got on the tram. One of them had his face painted red and white. They were drunk, but not obnoxious. The tram turned onto Burke St and there was a mob of English Rugby Hooligans waiting to get on the tram. I gave them the benefit of the doubt since the first batch was well-behaved.

And did those feet, in ancient time

Walk upon England’s mountains green?

And was the holy lamb of God

On England’s pleasant pastures seen?

This new batch was, well, drunker. The ringleader got the mob singing that song, and then when that was over, they sang Swing Low, Sweet Chariot (I didn’t realise that was a drinking song, but anyway. Perhaps they were serenading the tram itself?). Each tram stop down the hill, one or two more England fans would get on the tram. The ringleader started yelling at everyone to move down to let the new fans on the tram.

Then came the Samoans.

“No Samoans on this tram!” yelled the ringleader. He even made it into a repetitive song. Then, the painted-face guy yelled (louder) “Let the Samoans on the tram!”. The ringleader, sensing that he might be alone in his opinion about the Samoans, decided to switch sides and started yelling for the Samoans to get on board. They declined, as there was simply no more room. Shortly afterwards, partway through the second singing of that feet song, I had to get off to change trams. My seatmate wished me luck.

Everyone there was good-natured and (aside from being drunk) rather pleasant to be around. I was laughing out loud for much of the trip. I can see how that sort of thing could get ugly though. If they were drunker, and if the game hadn’t gone as well, and if they were somehow riled up – the mood could quickly change into a tram-trashing episode. An England-Australia game might lead to bloodshed in the streets…

Remember that scene in “Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels” where they went into that Samoan bar? Haha! Yeah, that was a good one, wasn’t it?