“Bomb us first!” -Sydney

This Sydney vs Melbn rivalry is getting ridiculous. The back-story is that there were a bunch of arrests last week in co-ordinated raids in both Sydney and Melbn, designed to catch some allegedly home-grown alleged terrorist maybe baddies. 

This week, Carl Scully, the NSW Head Of Police And Stuff made a fuss and announced that he’ll be spending $20 million on more police and stuff. Why? Well everyone knows that Sydney is the best city in Australia, and therefore it will be blown up first.

“If you had to name one city in Australia more likely to be subject to a terror threat or actually having a threat carried out, I think it would have to be Sydney,” Mr Scully said.

He went on to say “Neah neeeaaaah neeeaaahhh poo on you, Melbn, you smelly dirty little armpit of a hick town. You’re not worth blowing up! Brisbane? Don’t make me giggle like a little girly. Perth? Where’s that?” No. I’m making that part up.

The other side of the story happened right after the arrest spree last week. A spokesperson for the Victoria Police And Drug Distribution Commission said something along the lines of “Melbn has to be very careful, our terror cell is better than Sydney’s, and with the Commonwealth Games coming up, we’ll be blown up first for sure. Take that, Sydney.” So the gauntlet had been thrown.

Isn’t it a bit twisted that the traditional Melbn vs Sydney rivalry extends into this “we’ll be blown up first” thing? And why are they wasting their time with Australia anyway?